In our Manager Development program, we ask our students about their favorite bosses. Often, managers discover their favorite leaders have a similar DiSC style.
They also realize that their least favorite leaders tend to have other DiSC styles.
Then another powerful realization sets in…
You are someone’s least favorite leader for no other reason than your style.
Your style probably irks someone else. Or has them shaking their head in confusion.
Best case, that person feels alienated. Worst case? Trust has been destroyed.
The good news is that you can learn about DiSC styles and use that knowledge to adapt how you interact with others on your team.
New to DiSC? The framework reflects how you express yourself and interact with others — here’s a quick DiSC exercise to try.
Identify the challenges.
Each of us has unique strengths, but issues often arise when we’re in the shadow of those strengths. Here are a few examples:
- The “D” style is fast-paced, and they might struggle with waiting for team feedback before taking action.
- The “i” style values warm relationships, so they may have a hard time with difficult conversations.
- The “S” style prioritizes group harmony, and they might have difficulty making a decision, especially if it upsets someone on the team.
- The “C” style excels with time to analyze their work, so they may struggle if they have deal with an urgent issue without adequate information.
Having an honest awareness of your style can help you adapt to the parts of your job that require you to step into those challenges.
It is also worth noting that everyone has elements of all four styles, depending on the situation. Your style just shows you which activities take less energy to engage in and which are likely to push you outside of your comfort zone.
Act on that knowledge to adapt how you communicate.
It’s great to know everything about your DiSC style — both strengths and challenges — but until you act on this knowledge, you won’t experience significant growth.
It’s your responsibility as a leader to adapt to the styles of your team members. Build awareness of the other DiSC styles, and work to understand your tendencies and how others may interpret them.
Knowing which DiSC styles make up your team makes it easier for you to communicate in ways that are effective and respectful for each individual. You can meet them where they shine.
- When working with the “D” style: Give autonomy, identify goals, end meetings with action steps, and specifically address how they are getting you closer to your goal.
- When working with the “i” style: Take a few minutes to chat before a meeting, actively listen to their ideas and ask questions, and invite them to collaborate whenever possible.
- When working with the “S” style: Solicit feedback from everybody during a meeting before making a decision, communicate upcoming changes as far in advance as possible including details on the change management plan, and ask their opinion before stating your own.
- When working with the “C” style: Send meeting agendas and relevant materials before meetings, allow time for processing before soliciting feedback, and use facts and metrics when communicating future goals instead of emotional appeals.
Adapt how you interact with others and bring out the best in each person.
Ultimately, you may not be every person’s favorite leader, but everyone benefits when you lead with understanding and build a culture of effective communication and trust.
So, the next time you find yourself in a difficult interaction, ask yourself: How can I adjust my approach to meet this person where they are? Turn your frustration into connection and outstanding leadership.
Matthew Cosgrove is an Everything DiSC® Certified Practitioner, Bloom Growth Coach, and professional facilitator with a passion for building trust and effective communication across organizations. With expertise in business systems, education, and team development, he partners with mission-driven leaders to create sustainable growth and long-term success. With a light-hearted, approachable style, Matthew creates a safe environment where people feel comfortable engaging and learning, even when navigating complex challenges.